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Post by anotherfed on Apr 1, 2015 10:04:40 GMT -5
I heard ... that ODAR was tired of waiting for cert lists and has decided to use the Powerball system of selecting new hires from the Register. Here's hoping for a lucky ping pong ball!
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Post by Gaidin on Apr 1, 2015 10:08:47 GMT -5
Awesome, thats my retirement strategy and my employment strategy rolled into one.
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Post by funkyodar on Apr 1, 2015 11:01:39 GMT -5
Things are really heating up between OPM and SSA. OPM representatives derided SSA as "The UnSocial Security Administration" today in congressional committee meetings. To which, SSA responded that HR stood for Horse's Rear. OPM then called SSA the So Stupid Agency and SSA retorted with the highly precedential case of Rubber V Glue.
Sources confirm that things escalated to a rubber band assault and one party may or may not have suffered an "eye put out" injury.
Unofficial sources relate that an "after we get out for the day" fight is scheduled for the playground nearest the National Mall.
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Post by saaao on Apr 1, 2015 11:06:16 GMT -5
I understand for security purposes only one copy of an encrypted CD was made of the ALJ register, with all other records being destroyed. When OPM went to the employee entrusted with keeping it, the employee apparently told them he thinks his dog buried it in the backyard after he was done playing with it. This employee was immediately given a quality step increase and a citation for outstanding efficiency.
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Post by ibnlurkin on Apr 1, 2015 11:08:57 GMT -5
Please name the time and place so that frustrated ALJ candidates can form a ring around the belligerents and goad them on in a good old fashioned nose bloodying, eye blacking, eye gouging rumpus !
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Post by anotherfed on Apr 1, 2015 12:16:16 GMT -5
I heard ... that the certs are in, but nothing has been done yet because the entire HR department is on the exploratory committee for the Bob presidential campaign. They're busy.
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Post by luckylady2 on Apr 1, 2015 12:36:46 GMT -5
But the April 1 rumor I heard was that ODAR is getting frustrated with the quality of the candidates OPM is sending them, especially the start-from-the-top method, so it's now decided to ask for certs from the bottom of the Register up.
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Post by Gaidin on Apr 1, 2015 12:38:36 GMT -5
But the April 1 rumor I heard was that ODAR is getting frustrated with the quality of the candidates OPM is sending them, especially the start-from-the-top method, so it's now decided to ask for certs from the bottom of the Register up. Go home DLoTS you're drunk.
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Post by luckylady2 on Apr 1, 2015 12:50:22 GMT -5
I heard ... that ODAR was tired of waiting for cert lists and has decided to use the Powerball system of selecting new hires from the Register. Here's hoping for a lucky ping pong ball! Isn't that how they arrived at the NOR's?
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Post by Gram Pop on Apr 1, 2015 12:57:12 GMT -5
I heard that the delay this time is due to an unprecedented lack of crickets. Former VP Al Gore has concluded that the scarcity of the noisy critters is due to global warming. The Washington Post has launched an investigation and certain members of Congress have proposed forming a committee to get to the bottom of this conundrum.
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Post by Missundaztood on Apr 1, 2015 13:24:12 GMT -5
I heard they are busy making a new X Files episode about this process.
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Post by Gram Pop on Apr 1, 2015 14:07:23 GMT -5
This has been a welcome diversion. But now I have to get back to my current project. I am working on a brief discussing whether or not sovereign immunity bars a suit against the government for negligent infliction of emotional distress in connection with inexplicable delays in making hiring decisions. If the claim is recognizable, damages will include the costs of self treatment such as situational beverages and binge watching of House of Cards. Any other creative ideas for damage claims will be incorporated in the eventual lawsuit.
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Post by JudgeRatty on Apr 1, 2015 14:13:34 GMT -5
This has been a welcome diversion. But now I have to get back to my current project. I am working on a brief discussing whether or not sovereign immunity bars a suit against the government for negligent infliction of emotional distress in connection with inexplicable delays in making hiring decisions. If the claim is recognizable, damages will include the costs of self treatment such as situational beverages and binge watching of House of Cards. Any other creative ideas for damage claims will be incorporated in the eventual lawsuit. OCD related treatment as well as treatment for carpal tunnel syndrome and trigger finger related to repeatedly hitting refresh.
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Post by bartleby on Apr 1, 2015 15:23:40 GMT -5
Luckylady2 is an insider and works at the Crystal Palace: "But the April 1 rumor I heard was that ODAR is getting frustrated with the quality of the candidates OPM is sending them, especially the start-from-the-top method, so it's now decided to ask for certs from the bottom of the Register up." She just let slip the new National policy. This policy is based on equality and affirmative action. How else would you explain an Agency that can hire lawyers, but instead promotes "paralegals" with a high school education?? Oh, I am sorry. I forgot we were playing April Fool's day. My Bad....
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Post by luckylady2 on Apr 1, 2015 17:45:34 GMT -5
Ooooops!
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Post by gary on Apr 1, 2015 18:47:52 GMT -5
Maybe Bob has the certs but figured if he sent the emails today nobody would believe them.
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Post by anotherfed on Apr 1, 2015 19:30:11 GMT -5
bartleby, Take the keyboard away from the kitties...
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Post by bartleby on Apr 2, 2015 7:14:59 GMT -5
You know, you give them a little authority, let them hold a few hearings and they get carried away. If this keeps up I will have to take my gavel away from them. So far the orange one has my remand rate beat all to heck. She's running a 99% agree rate with the AC. I will give them all a stern talking to as soon as the Black Persian, Angel, gets out of hearings this morning. Cats, what are you gonna do??
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Post by gary on Apr 2, 2015 7:24:29 GMT -5
You know, you give them a little authority, let them hold a few hearings and they get carried away. If this keeps up I will have to take my gavel away from them. So far the orange one has my remand rate beat all to heck. She's running a 99% agree rate with the AC. I will give them all a stern talking to as soon as the Black Persian, Angel, gets out of hearings this morning. Cats, what are you gonna do?? This would explain your office's ban on laser pointers in the hearing rooms.
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Post by funkyodar on Apr 2, 2015 7:51:16 GMT -5
Is catnip a DAA issue?
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