Post by nylawyer on Oct 31, 2007 18:04:43 GMT -5
I was supposed to be out taking my kids trick or treating tonight, but my costume was a judge's robe that my wife bought me, and given my sub 50 score I'm really not in the mood. 
So, instead, I am sitting home answering the door handing out candy to sullen teenagers who don't bother to even say anything, never mind wear a costume (unless they have all been pre-schoolers dressed up as sullen teenagers, in which case I live in the coolest neighborhood ever).
Any way, given my low score, I have no hope of getting placed in my limited geographical area (in and around New York City), unless of course no one else above me wants to go there. Given that, I thought I'd share my research on each of the offices.
Manhattan is the most prestigious. However, they are instituting requirements that all ALJ's must live within a two block radius of the office, where studio apartments rent at about $2500 a month.
Queens supposedly has great food in the building. However, they have instituted daily beatings. The union is supposedly working on an appeal.
The Brooklyn office has been on fire for the past 20 months. There has not been enough money in the budget to date to douse the flames. There is some hope this year, as apparently Congress is debating an allocation that will either go to fire suppression or building a bridge in Alaska for the caribou (it may be a toll bridge). However, lest you be dissuaded, be assured that the abundance of asbestos in the air has kept the fire from spreading.
The Bronx office is in a bad area. How bad, you ask? Let's just say there's a reason for those 10 point veteran preferences.
The Westchester office has no work, as the entire county has an average yearly income of about a $1.4 million. Therefore, the new judge will be loaned out. The office is in the process of purchasing a Winnebago that will be dubbed "The Road Warrior", and the new judge will be expected to spend his time driving from town to town fighting crime ala Bruce Banner.
The Newark office is located in the Iron Bound section of the city. As such, the official language of the office is Portugese. You needn't be fluent, as long as you are willing to learn. However, in case you didn't know this, Newark is located in New Jersey. That apparently is a turn off for many people.
Finally, the Long Island office is actually being moved from Jericho to the federally owned Plum Island off of Orient Point. The office will be sharing the island with the current resident, the Federal Animal Disease Center. Staff will be encouraged to play with the puppies.
As I said, just passing this along, since none of this info is going to do me any good, unless by some chance everyone who is called for these offices refuses. Let your friends know as well, so all you happy people who are willing to go anywhere are fully informed as to the pros and cons.
So, instead, I am sitting home answering the door handing out candy to sullen teenagers who don't bother to even say anything, never mind wear a costume (unless they have all been pre-schoolers dressed up as sullen teenagers, in which case I live in the coolest neighborhood ever).Any way, given my low score, I have no hope of getting placed in my limited geographical area (in and around New York City), unless of course no one else above me wants to go there. Given that, I thought I'd share my research on each of the offices.
Manhattan is the most prestigious. However, they are instituting requirements that all ALJ's must live within a two block radius of the office, where studio apartments rent at about $2500 a month.
Queens supposedly has great food in the building. However, they have instituted daily beatings. The union is supposedly working on an appeal.
The Brooklyn office has been on fire for the past 20 months. There has not been enough money in the budget to date to douse the flames. There is some hope this year, as apparently Congress is debating an allocation that will either go to fire suppression or building a bridge in Alaska for the caribou (it may be a toll bridge). However, lest you be dissuaded, be assured that the abundance of asbestos in the air has kept the fire from spreading.
The Bronx office is in a bad area. How bad, you ask? Let's just say there's a reason for those 10 point veteran preferences.
The Westchester office has no work, as the entire county has an average yearly income of about a $1.4 million. Therefore, the new judge will be loaned out. The office is in the process of purchasing a Winnebago that will be dubbed "The Road Warrior", and the new judge will be expected to spend his time driving from town to town fighting crime ala Bruce Banner.
The Newark office is located in the Iron Bound section of the city. As such, the official language of the office is Portugese. You needn't be fluent, as long as you are willing to learn. However, in case you didn't know this, Newark is located in New Jersey. That apparently is a turn off for many people.
Finally, the Long Island office is actually being moved from Jericho to the federally owned Plum Island off of Orient Point. The office will be sharing the island with the current resident, the Federal Animal Disease Center. Staff will be encouraged to play with the puppies.
As I said, just passing this along, since none of this info is going to do me any good, unless by some chance everyone who is called for these offices refuses. Let your friends know as well, so all you happy people who are willing to go anywhere are fully informed as to the pros and cons.
